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March 15, 2010

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I believe we have a part to play in this etiquette game. Same as in offline relationships, we show people how we want to be treated by our own actions. If we're less than impressed with someone's rudeness or inability to show common courtesy, it's our job to let them know their behavior is unacceptable.

As we navigate this sort of new world of online social networks, we have to reset some of the rules and establish new norms. Otherwise, we will be lost.

Lauren - As I mentioned via Twitter, I'm not sure that netiquette can be taught. Then again, I'm not sure straight up etiquette can be taught either. I mean, yeah, of course children can learn this growing up. I'm talking about adults. One thing I learned when I "became an adult" is that just because you are old enough to drink or rent a car of have children (gasp!) does not mean you automatically have common sense. Adults do dumb things all of the time. See Tiger Woods or many US politicians. I mean, can you teach them to be smarter about personal decisions? I'm not sure, but I don't think so.

Crap. Does this mean I'm becoming cynical? I hope not. I do have tremendous faith in humans. You know me. I love people. I really do. However, the more dumb choices I see people making...

So, how does this tie to netiqutte? I don't think that humans with common sense all of the sudden forget it because we now friend & follow people. I believe that the same people that have terrible offline social skills are likely to also suck online and vice versa.

Did I miss your point of this post or did my ramble make sense?

DJ Waldow
Director of Community, Blue Sky Factory
@djwaldow

Chris,
Resetting the rules and establishing new norms is exactly what I will begin addressing when I explore social media (specifically comm industry and cmty mgr position) from the perspective of Alice and the Looking Glass.

DJ,
Thank you, as always, for your optimism and feedback! You are not rambling and make sense, but I do think we sometimes forget common sense online a bit more easily or become a too relaxed no matter what we have been taught or is our instinct.

I also believe that etiquette should not be forgotten even if we are on the virtual world. Hey, its still another "person" we are talking to, not a computer.

Hi Lauren, I've been meaning to reply since reading this a few weeks back. I can certainly relate having been at receiving end of questionable behavior in my time as a Community Manager.

In practicing my "zen skin" I remind myself that sometimes this behavior is a by-product of a communtiy that has a very strong sense of ownership. Ergo they don't take kindly to being 'reprimanded' or even left out. Whatever the circumstance may be, they sometimes view the CM in a different light to members.

Of course this doesn't negate the need for netiquette but it does help to think it may be a result of a very robust & mostly healthy community?

I find it very rare that these individuals will act the same when engaged in a one-on-one dialogue. It is then they accept you are in fact human too.

I do understand where you are coming from however!

Interesting! in any of the community building or maintenance advice is it addressed how the community should treat a community manager.

Remember what should be remembered, and forget what should be forgotten.Alter what is changeable, and accept what is mutable.

Hi Lauren, I've been meaning to reply since reading this a few weeks back. I can certainly relate having been at receiving end of questionable behavior in my time as a Community Manager.

In practicing my "zen skin" I remind myself that sometimes this behavior is a by-product of a communtiy that has a very strong sense of ownership. Ergo they don't take kindly to being 'reprimanded' or even left out. Whatever the circumstance may be, they sometimes view the CM in a different light to members.

Of course this doesn't negate the need for netiquette but it does help to think it may be a result of a very robust & mostly healthy community?

I find it very rare that these individuals will act the same when engaged in a one-on-one dialogue. It is then they accept you are in fact human too.

I do understand where you are coming from however!

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Wow. It's as though Bil Keane decided to take up political cartooning. Except for the one with the eagle molesting the lady, which should've been titled "I'm from the government, and I'm here to help you".

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I am glad it was appropriately punished. I don't work in a big agency, i am an independent, so I don't have any insight into how agencies bill, but I know how I do it, and there is no padding there, so for others to muddy that up is pretty irritating indee

You're right. It actually pays to remember courtesy even in a mediated portal. You still are talking to people, and the words you use and post are not left unread in the black hole that is the world wide web. It actually promotes better relationships to remember these two words, and many more, in such a context.

Hi There! I agree with all your commentary. Can’t wait to hear more from you…

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